Editing of DQZ: Day One

Today I started to edit my first OYAN novel, Dyani: The Quest for Zuriel.
I've started just by reading through it and taking notes of what needs to be changed.  I'm almost through it all.

I have three (albeit small) pages of notes.

It's rather overwhelming for me, but I'm consoling myself by telling myself that at least I can see what needs to be fixed.

A few things are:

• It moves too fast.
• I need more hoops from the actual villain.
• Change the villain's name.
• More character development for Niyet, Sheol (whose name will be changed), Yevriel, Fairn, Jalem and Alistair. 
• Setting...
• Durn [the dog] attacking Yevriel is almost a given that Yevriel is bad.
• Change the villain's background.
• There are some questions that go unanswered.

 I actually have thirty-one notes, and I think I badly need to re-write chapters nine through eleven.  I have a feeling that I'll have to keep reminding myself it's only a first draft.

~Charlotte Grace, the Mind Traveler

Dyani: The Quest for Zuriel COMPLETED

I did it.
I finished my very first OYAN novel, and I'm ecstatic about it.

Dyani: The Quest for Zuriel first draft:

Begun January 19, 2012

Finished: March 13, 2012

Total Word Count: 23,284

There's a big plot hole in it, it's kind of short(er than my first NaNoNovel), and the climax kind of sucks, but those things will be fixed.

Because this is the first novel I'm really planning on editing and rewriting, which I have never really done before.  That is how purely excited I am.  That's how much I love the characters.

Six people are lucky enough to get to the read the horribleness of the evil first draft.  I've given them the choice whether or not they'll actually help me rewrite.

But, I won't start editing right away.  No, I'll let it sit through Script Frenzy before I start attacking it.  But before April I plan on working on a novel I said I'd critique, working more on Semmre, and maybe reading into all hours of the night rather than writing.

As a special treat, here is an excerpt.  I don't know why I'm letting you read this unedited crud, but I am.  Enjoy.

I began taking dresses out of the wardrobe and tearing them to pieces out of spite for the Madam.  She wasn’t going to force me to be a lady, reduced to nothing but a pompous, unimportant woman used to having everything handed to her on a plate.

A sleeve came off of a blue, silk dress with a satisfying riiiip.

Prince Alistair and his men had already left.

A red ribbon tore away from the golden cloth in a merciless state of being.

Maybe she could stand wearing fancy clothes and sipping tea all day, but not I.  Maybe she enjoyed having no purpose, but never could I.

Silver buttons popped of the torso of a particularly fancy piece of clothing.  There was knock at the door.

“What!?” I yelled.

“It’s Sabrine.  Do you need anything?”  She entered my room and her mouth fell open.

“Dyani, what are you doing!?”

“Getting revenge,” I snarled.

~Charlotte Grace, the Mind Traveler

Dyani: The Quest for Zuriel Cover

So, you know how yesterday I came up with the name for my OYAN?
Here is the cover for Dyani: The Quest for Zuriel (we'll call it DQZ for short).
Thoughts?

~Charlotte Grace, the Mind Traveler

Dyani: The Quest for Zuriel

To my immense pleasure, I have come up with a name for my OYAN.
Dyani: The Quest for Zuriel
Let me know if it sounds cheesy...I think it does.
Now to create a cover.  ~mutters something about a sword~

~Charlotte Grace, the Mind Traveler